Reduce stress with these 6 types of self care

Last week I talked about the importance of self-care. I also addressed some common myths and barriers that a lot of people have regarding self care. If you haven’t read that post yet, I encourage you to check it out here, first. This week, I am going to expand on that. We’re going to go over 6 specific types of self care and how you can incorporate a solid self care practice into your life.

Types of self care #1: Body

“Take care of your body. It’s the only place you have to live.”

Jim Rohn

Our body is often the most neglected type of self care. It is also often not seen as self care at all. If we do bother to take care of our bodies in the first place, it is the first thing that many people start to neglect when they get stressed and overwhelmed. Maybe one of the ways you deal with the emotion is by over-eating, or maybe you go in the opposite direction and skip lunch. When we are stressed and short on time, the first thing to drop off our schedule is our gym time or workouts.

Unfortunately, this is the worst thing we can do for ourselves, but it is a very natural response. The part of our brain that deals with decision making is called the frontal lobe. When we are stressed our central nervous system enters into what is called sympathetic dominance state. In this state we lose the ability to make good decisions (eating a healthy lunch, not snacking, sticking to a gym or sleep schedule).

An easy way to check to see if your body is in sympathetic dominance (which often happens before our awareness of it) is to check if you tongue is on the roof of your mouth. If it is, take a second to drop your tongue, and relax your shoulders and pelvic floor.

During times of high stress, we have to take extra intention to remember to take care of our bodies.

Some minimal activities for self care of the body are:

• Exercise: The minimum amount of recommended exercise for self-care is 90 minutes per week. That equates to just three 30-minute sessions. Alternatively, a small 15-minute activity 6-7 days a week will also work. Personally, I prefer to try to get in a 15 minute walk every day, which also allows me the opportunity for fresh air and to get out in nature.
• Eat a healthy meal.
• Take your vitamins.
• Put on lotion.
• Schedule your annual exam. This is an often overlooked way to take care of our bodies and make sure we are staying healthy.
• Wear clothing you like and makes you feel good. There is a difference between wearing a pair of sweatpants because nothing else fits and you feel shame from putting on jeans, and wearing the same pair of sweatpants because they are soft, cozy, and literally the most favorite thing in your wardrobe. Try choosing your outfit in the morning based on what feels good to you and what you can wear with confidence.

Types of self care #2: Mind

“A restless mind can take you places, but a well rested mind takes you where you want to go.”

Raihan Hadi

The second really important type of self-care is your mind. This form of self-care encourages you to pursue activities that give your mind a rest, or engage in activities that rest you. Examples of things that this would not include are things like doing research or working from home.

One thing I do want to point out is that when you rest your mind you don’t need to turn off your brain. It’s not necessarily about entering into a state of nothingness. Resting your brain is more about switching gears. It’s about focusing on something we like and want to do. It is about moving to something that uses your brain in a different way.

Here are some activities for self care for your mind:

• Playing games (here’s a fun list of board games; favorites in our house are Pandemic and 7 Wonders)
• Reading for fun
• Color for fun
• Trying something new
• Taking time to unplug from technology
• Create a daily affirmation. Here we want to take some mental energy to intentionally focus on something positive and uplifting instead of exhausting.
• Say “no.” This is about creating boundaries. This might be telling people and activities that you’re simply not going to engage in them today. It might include delegating a task. Or you might be at a point where you just say enough is enough.
• Journal

Types of self care #3: Heart

“The human heart feels things the eyes cannot see and knows things that the mind cannot understand.”

Robert Vallet

The next area to take care of is the heart. You’ll often also seen this called emotional self care. Remember above, when I talked about sympathetic dominance affecting your frontal lobes and decision-making abilities? It also causes your emotional skills to go out the window. This is where the heart comes into play. We need to make sure we stay connected and grounded into what we need.

Often times, we are feeling a feeling and its effecting us long before our brain is processing and turning it into language. An example here is when we are feeling tense in stress and anxiety. Our body is very tense and in tune to what we are feeling, but our brain is not necessarily clued into the tenseness or those feelings yet. When we become aware, we can start to do something about it (see the tongue on the roof of your mouth example above).

Self-care for the heart can prevent emotional numbness and “flight” reactions. It allows us to stay connected to tasks and people.

Here are some activities for self care to control your emotions:

• What engages your emotions in positive ways:
  • do something that makes you laugh (humor is a coping mechanism for a reason: it works and it is often healthy to find the humor in a situation),
  • spend time with your pets (non-stop studies showing how spending time with your pet does good for the heart)
  • do a kind act for someone
• Crying – totally okay to have an emotional release, crying is healthy and good
• doing something that comforts you (whatever makes you feel cozy)
• engage in a meaningful conversation

Types of self care #4: Soul

“If you fuel your journey on the opinions of others, you are going to run out of gas.”

Dr. Steve Maraboli

Out of the 6 types of self care, this one is about connecting to something bigger than yourself. It is about connection to a higher purpose. To the Earth, spirituality, the Universe, or the greater good. Taking care of your soul is about recognizing that there is more than just you. There is more to explore and more meaning behind life than what we inherently see. The focus is not yourself, but at the same time you are focusing on your inner self.

Activities for self care for the soul:

• Practice gratitude
• Spend time in nature
• Meditate
• Engage in activities that interest you and inspire you to connect to something bigger than yourself (singing, dancing, painting, hobbies, taking up a cause, helping someone, doing an act for others)
• Practice yoga, which grounds you into thinking about how your body moves
• Spiritual or religious practice – pray is also self-care for the soul

Types of self care #5: Work

“You can love your job, but your job will not love you back.”

Cathie Black

In today’s day and age there is a lot of push to align our jobs up with some higher purpose that fulfills us. While that can certainly fulfill our souls and make our jobs easier and feel more worthwhile, it is important to remember that our job is only ever just a job. Our job should never be what defines us. I’m not saying you should never go after finding a job that fits with your passions. I’m saying your job is not a person. It does not have feelings. It will not stick up for you or fight for you.

We are here to live our values and our purpose. When it comes to our job, there are some things we can do for ourselves so that we stay fulfilled, even if it’s not our life’s purpose. First and foremost, know your values. This is not a higher purpose. These are things that you value at your core. Things like respect, flexibility, innovation, trust, teamwork, openness, being creative, etc. Second, understand the purpose of your job. Maybe you are a teacher and the purpose of your job is to nurture and open children’s eyes to the possibilities in front of them. Perhaps you are nurse or doctor, helping heal people so they can live their life fully. Or possibly you are a scientist, doing research that will help society become more knowledgeable about something we don’t understand. Maybe you are an office assistant and you streamline processes and help others so that they can do their jobs easier. Whatever that is for you, know the purpose of your job.

Other forms of self-care at work are having healthy boundaries and creating community.

A few specific activities for self care at work:

• Connect with colleagues to build a community
• Decorate your workspace in a way that makes you happy
• Take a dedicated lunch break, and actually eat lunch
• Leave work on time
• List work tasks that excite you and then dedicate time every day to do that work

Types of self care #6: Home

“Clutter causes stress, and clutter is one of the main barriers of productivity.

Charisse Ward

Those 5 types of self care are the core, but we can’t neglect our home. We spend a lot of time at home, and it is the core space where we relax and take time for ourselves. Therefore, we have to be mindful to take care of our home life as well.

Simple activities for self care to practice at home are:

• Keep routines. Our mind and body like routines, and routines are very much our friend, as long as they are serving our best interests. Some simple routines could be:
  • A morning routine when you wake up
  • An evening routine before you go to bed
  • A dinner routine including family time and taking care to leave a clean kitchen
• Have dedicated family time
• Be flexible. Life is fluid and always changing, and it is important to remember that, and be flexible so we can adapt and roll with whatever gets thrown our way.
• Have a declutter habit. Whether we like it or not, there is a constant influx of things in our life. Stuff takes up time, energy, and mental capacity. Having a regular routine to remove things from your home and life can help manage the mental load of clutter.

Body, mind, heart, soul, work and home are the 6 essential areas of self-care. There is so much here, and I don’t want you thinking you have to do all of it. Instead,

Self-care is an essential part of stress management and our overall well-being. When we are not taking care of ourselves, we cannot give our best to others around us. Pick one of the area’s mentioned (body, mind, heart, soul, work and home) and come up with a way to put it in practice in your own life. What is one suggestion you read today that you can put into practice in the next week or month?

Related Reading:

• Finding the motivation to achieve your goals
• A year end reflection: How and why to do one